he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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