if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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