yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
