she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize