It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize