he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
