Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
two words: eviction party
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
