She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
