maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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