okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
