Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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