so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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