hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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