I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
