From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Randomize
