I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize