I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
This is the high leading the old right now
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
