I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
