Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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