so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
there was a trapeze. enough said
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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