I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
