Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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