I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
