So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
