Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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