I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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