At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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