It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
