I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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