that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
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