I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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