oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
