I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize