i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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