Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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