Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize