that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I lost the right to judge tonight
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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