I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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