Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
