we have pet lesbian snakes
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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