i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize