She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
