im drinking this country out of the recession.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
