he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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