I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
