I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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