your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
you made out with another girl for some wings
I supernannyed him into submission
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
