Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
