Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
