I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Terrible idea I love it
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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